New Beginnings: February 1976
by miraleeann
Summary: An extension of the New Beginnings world. A request that I received.


February 1976

Her sock clad feet hurried up the spiral staircase. She yelped softly as her foot slid, nearly causing her to fall. As the sound escaped her mouth, she froze momentarily, listening for any sign that someone had heard her. When she was absolutely sure that the castle had remained silent she began hurrying once more.

For years now her relationship with her sister had been a challenge. As children she had been sure that Petunia was just jealous of the skills she possessed. She had often tried to teach her how to do the same things in hopes that maybe Petunia's magic was just a bit delayed. It was a constant issue between the two. Their once close relationship had changed drastically. Things only got worse when Lily's Hogwarts letter arrived. Petunia had gone out of her way to make her sister feel stupid for being excited to leave for school. Lily had tried numerous times to keep in touch throughout the school year. She had often sent letters and packages to no response. When she finally questioned her sister about it Petunia had said that she wasn't going to use an owl to deliver mail, that doing so was weird and something only a freak would do. Lily had cried herself to sleep that night. She hadn't mentioned a word of it to her parents. Despite the fact that they always seemed thrilled at her being a witch, she couldn't help but worry that they were just being nice and that deep down they thought she was a freak too.

In the past year the relationship between the two sisters had only grown worse. Petunia went out of her way to avoid her sister and when she didn't, she made it a point to be as mean to her as she could. She often called her a freak or made comments about how abnormal she was. If their parents praised Lily for anything, Petunia would roll her eyes in disgust.

A month earlier when Lily had been home for the holidays, Petunia had been especially hurtful. Lily had spent a part of supper explaining the last Quidditch game to her parents while Petunia sat at the table looking absolutely disgusted. Later when their parents were asleep, Petunia made it a point to seek Lily out in the kitchen and tell her exactly what she thought of her and her freak school.

Lily knew that her sister was wrong. She knew that Petunia was likely as jealous as she had been when they were little girls. It didn't help it to hurt any less though.

Petunia's words often had a habit of creeping into Lily's mind when she was trying to fall asleep. She would toss and turn for hours willing sleep to come only to have it deny her repeatedly. In the past few weeks she had given up on hoping for sleep and had spent her time in the Owlery staring up at the night sky. It made her drowsy quicker than anything else could and when she felt tired enough she went back down to her dormitory and slept like a baby.

She quietly crept up the last few stairs. Despite the fact that she had yet to find anyone else in the Owlery so late at night, she still had the constant fear that she would be caught. She wasn't afraid of getting into trouble. She was only worried that if she was caught it would hurt her ability to be able to get away with sneaking back in the future.

"Was it the same?"

She stopped just before reaching the landing that led to the large room. A disapproving look took over her face as she slowly stepped backwards until she was two steps lower. She would know the sound of his voice anywhere. It was the voice that she had turned down more than once. She couldn't stand the sound of it. She couldn't really stand him. He was arrogant and a bully. He only really cared about himself and she was sure of it.

A loud sniffle echoed through the Owlery.

Her face changed as the look of disapproval vanished and a stunned expression took over. She had to have imagined it. James Potter did not cry. She was also nearly certain that he wouldn't be seen with someone who was crying either.

"I don't care," the other boy replied, his voice thick with tears. "You know that I don't care about them." There was a long pause. Lily held her breath as she slowly and quietly took another step backwards. Her foot easily found the step below her. "It doesn't make it hurt less," the words came with heavy tears.

Lily suddenly felt guilt rush through her body at being privy to his words. If James Potter didn't cry, Sirius Black definitely didn't. He was the epitome of cool. She was sure that she had to be sleep walking or imagining things. She tried to remember if she had hit her head at all earlier in the day.

"I hate that I care if they hate me."

"Siri," the gentle reply came causing Lily's eyes to widen, "they don't deserve you. You have me and our family."

She felt something tug at her heart at the way in which James had addressed his friend. Lily was sure that they were discussing Sirius' parents. It was no secret that the boy hadn't lived with his own family in years. Lily had always assumed that Sirius couldn't have cared less about his real family. She also assumed that she would have never heard James' voice take on such a gentle tone. She was nearly positive that his voice sounded on the brink of tears as well.

"I know and I'm grateful for it," Sirius replied through his tears which were now turning into sobs. "More grateful than you know Jamie." A heartbreaking sob echoed off the castle walls. "What is wrong with me? Why do they hate me so much?"

She held her breath as she waited for his reply. A loud voice was berating her for staying and listening to their private conversation. She knew that Sirius would be mortified if she was discovered and she wasn't positive that James wouldn't feel the same. A much smaller voice however, was adamant that she stay put; bargaining that this conversation was something that she needed to hear.

"Nothing," James answered in a voice that was so soft that she had to strain to hear it. "You are brilliant, honestly you are. It's them Siri. Something is wrong with them. They don't deserve you."

She was sure that he was crying now as well. Not nearly as hard as Sirius but softly, sympathetically. And that damn nickname. The sound of it tumbling out of his mouth with such ease was enough to make her want to cry as well.

Silence engulfed them for several long moments. If it wasn't for Sirius' constant sniffling Lily would have been sure that they had somehow exited the room without passing by her. More than once she thought about slowly walking back down the spiral staircase. She couldn't bring herself to do so though. Something inside of her was shifting. She was beginning to hope that she hadn't turned James down one too many times; that the boy would find it in himself to ask her out just once more.

"I don't say this enough," Sirius finally said. His tears sounded as though they had subsided a bit but his voice was now hoarse. The sound of it was enough to break Lily's heart. "But thank you."

"Stop," James replied in a sheepish tone.

"No really Jamie if it wasn't for you…" Sirius trailed off.

"I didn't do anything that any decent person wouldn't have done," James decided. Lily could practically feel the humbleness radiating off of him. She wasn't familiar with it and she couldn't deny that she liked it.

"You did," Sirius insisted. "You took care of me. You made me your family. You kept me safe."

"I can't help it," James replied. "You're my brother. I love you."

Lily felt her heart swell as she took another step backwards successfully ending up another stair lower.

"I love you too," Sirius replied his voice once again thick with tears.

"And I know that I don't know what it feels like to have parents like yours, but I do know what it feels like to see you like this and it's horrible at best."

She softly chewed on her bottom lip as her brain attempted to comprehend this new version of the boy she thought that she had all figured out.

A particularly loud sniffle echoed off of the walls.

"We should get out of here," Sirius said after a moment. "It's getting late."

"You're sure you're okay?" James asked in a concerned voice as Lily slowly backed down the staircase.

She didn't wait to hear Sirius' response. She knew that she could easily walk upstairs and act as if she had just arrived but she didn't want to embarrass either of them in such a way. The moment her feet made contact with the hallway floor she took off in a sprint to Gryffindor Tower. The thoughts were racing through her mind much too quickly to allow her to process most of them. There was one thing that she was absolutely certain of though, she hadn't been right about James Potter at all.


End file.
